


Sleepless

by Neverander



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Gen, Just working some stuff out, New to earth, Young Kara
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-16
Updated: 2018-10-16
Packaged: 2019-08-02 20:40:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,815
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16312322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Neverander/pseuds/Neverander
Summary: Kara lays out on the cool sand and stares up at the stars until the sun crests the horizon. She doesn't need to sleep and after waking up from what basically amounts to a twenty-four year coma she doesn't have any desire to try. So she lays in the sand and lets the wind sweeping the beach half bury her.





	Sleepless

**Author's Note:**

> Just had a lot of feelings about young Kara. I've had this for a while and figure I might as well get it out there.

Kara lays out on the cool sand and stares up at the stars until the sun crests the horizon. She doesn't need to sleep and after waking up from what basically amounts to a twenty-four year coma she doesn't have any desire to try. So she lays in the sand and lets the wind sweeping the beach half bury her.

 

It's nice.

  

The sand starts to warm and none of it bothers her eyes, not the sand or the bright sun. Everything is so strange on this planet. She just lays there thinking about how she could probably stay there forever and nothing would ever touch her. She could seep into the ground and maybe then, maybe being cut off from the yellow sun, maybe that would make her feel something, feel real. 

  
_Kara!_

  
She hears her name frantic and breathless and not too far away. She's been out here too long but she doesn't want to go. Doesn't want to leave. Doesn't want to disturb the sand coating her small frame. It feels nice, feels safe. 

  
_Kara!_

  
It doesn't sound angry. It sounds scared and on the edge of tears. Kara doesn't want to make anyone feel bad. She wriggles herself free from the sand just as someone crashes down onto her. 

  
_What the hell are you doing out here? We've all been looking for you. We were so worried. How long have you been here?_

  
Kara is getting the gist of what's being said but she has only recently learned English and all the words are said frantically and crush together so she isn't sure. 

  
"I'm here."

  
"Yes I can see that!" Alex leans back and brushes sand from Kara's clothes. “Come on let's get back to the house. Dad was gonna call," Alex pauses as she stands and looks at her quickly in a way Kara can't place, "he was really worried."

  
"Sorry." Kara stands and follows after her carefully curled into herself, trying not to jostle Alex who still hasn't let go of her shoulder. 

  
They make it down the beach and up the steps to the backyard in record time.   
Alex spots her mother through the kitchen window, "Mom, I got her, tell dad it's fine!"

  
Eliza yells for Jeremiah and is out the door in seconds.

   
Kara stops quick enough that Alex stumbles. "Sorry."

  
Alex lets go of Kara just as Eliza stoops down to hug her. "Are you alright? We were so worried."

  
Kara is stiff and careful not to move. She doesn't answer until Eliza pulls away. "I'm fine. Sorry." She steps back just a little. Alex frowns.

  
Jeremiah comes out of the house much calmer but Kara wishes she could sink back into the sand forever. "Hey Kara," he kneels down but doesn't touch her. "Let's go inside okay?" 

  
Kara nods and follows after them. Alex keeps an eye on her over her shoulder as if Kara might just run off again right then. They lead her into the living room and Kara sits carefully down on the couch. Alex perches on the arm as her parent sit across from Kara on the coffee table.  

  
No one speaks.

Alex starts swinging her left leg waiting for someone to say something. Kara doesn't know what to do or say. She doesn't want to be in this house with all of its breakable things and people. She wishes she was still on the beach, alone. She likes to watch the birds. Seagulls. They're so beautiful.  

  
"Kara."

  
She startles and looks up at Jeremiah, his face gentle and open. "How come you left the house?"

  
Kara doesn't know how to say that she doesn't sleep. That she feels alone. That she likes birds because they never had them on Krypton so they don't remind her of things she's lost. She likes staring at the stars, finding Rao far away if she really tries and staring at it for hours praying for everyone who's gone that she didn't even know. It feels like she's doing something if she at least prays for them because no one else will. She feels so much and she can't _do_ anything about it. She sticks to the simplest thing. "I broke your glasses." _Again._

  
Jeremiah tilts his head to meet her eyes. "That's okay. That's the only reason you left the house in the middle of the night?"

  
Alex's leg has stopped swinging and she's watching her carefully, like she knows there's more.

  
"No."

  
"Okay. Would you like to talk about it? Because, Kara,” He stoops a little to meet her gaze, “you can't just leave at night without any of us knowing where you are."

  
She furrows her brow, a crinkle forming between her eyes. "Why?"

  
"Because we worry about you and it isn't safe." Eliza leans in and gently touches her knee.

 

Kara can barely feel it but it makes her nervous for her to be so close.  
"I'm not going to hurt anybody." That's the whole point. She leaves and she's alone and no one gets hurt.

  
Eliza frowns. "We know that. We worry about _you_." 

  
Now Kara is confused. "But I don't get hurt. Nothing hurts me." Not anymore. 

  
Jeremiah draws her attention back to him. "That's not true. Hurt doesn't have to be physical, you know that, and people can still hurt you." His voice is soft but firm. "You're still a child and we need to know where you are and you shouldn't be going off alone anyway."

  
"You need to sleep too, you have school." Eliza sits back and Kara relaxes a little.

  
"No," Kara eyes Alex, "we don't have school today it's," she can't remember the word right now.

  
"Saturday." Alex supplies.  

  
"Yes. Saturday." She looks back to Eliza, "There's no school on _Saturday_." She mimics Alex almost exactly as she says the word. She still has her accent and she is both trying to get rid of it and afraid to lose it at the same time.  

  
"I know, honey, but you need to keep a schedule." Eliza looks like she’s going to lean in again.

  
Alex rolls her eyes. 

  
"Okay," Jeremiah cuts in, "can I talk to Kara alone?" 

  
Alex stands almost immediately. Eliza and Jeremiah have a silent conversation where she relents and follows Alex from the room. 

  
"Hey, Kara, I'm going to sit on the couch with you, is that alight?"

   
Kara nods and scoots all the way to one end of the couch. 

  
Jeremiah sits on the other end and angles his body to face her. "So, let's start at the beginning. You were upstairs and you got ready for bed and then what?"

   
"I got in bed." Jeremiah nods and encourages her when no other words seem to be forthcoming. "And I don't sleep. So I got up."

  
"You don't sleep at all or you couldn't sleep that night?" His eyes remain soft.

  
"I don't need sleep." Kara replies hesitantly. "So I don't." She pulls a pillow into her lap and tries not to fiddle with the seems. 

  
"So what do you do when you don't sleep?"

  
Jeremiah doesn't seem upset like Eliza was. "I draw or sit out on the roof or- or go down to the beach. I like the birds and the waves are so nice and the sand is so soft and it's-" she starts to panic, her voice starts to break. She can’t lose this. She just, "I need-“ How can she, “I need that I- I need it!" Kara is teary and unsure how to express herself. 

  
"Okay. It's okay, Kara." He scoots a little closer and Kara jerks the pillow between them. "Kara, you're not going to hurt me."

  
"You don't know that."

   
"Kara-"

   
"I don't want to hurt anyone and I don't want to be here!" The pillow stretches just enough to tear, it sounds so loud in Kara's ears, and she drops it jumping up from the couch. She's gone before Jeremiah can stand.

  
Alex and Eliza move into the living from where they'd been shamelessly listening in the kitchen. 

  
Alex heads for the stairs, "I'll get her." 

  
"Alex maybe just let her-"

  
She cuts him off. "I'm just going to make sure she's okay. Don't worry."

   
"Alright."

  
- 

  
Kara is sitting on the floor beneath their window hugging her knees tightly to her chest. Alex sits on her bed and notices that Kara's is cracked and tilting awkwardly. She chooses not to comment on it just then. Alex doesn't really know what to say but at least Kara is in the house and she's not alone. That's good, right? 

  
Kara doesn't move, doesn't even look up. Alex wars with herself internally on what to do and eventually just decides to go for it. She stands up and sits down right beside Kara. Not touching but close enough that Kara tenses and leans away just a little. "Kara, it's okay."

  
Kara's breath stutters in her chest, "it's not." 

  
Alex doesn't know what else to do. "We can fix whatever's broken."

  
Kara hunkers down even lower into her knees. "You can't fix me."

  
And, oh, that hurts.

There's really nothing Alex can say to that but she's sure gonna try. "You- you're not broken. You’re hurt, hurt beyond what any of us can even come close to understanding yeah, but we're here. If you want to talk about it, I'm here." 

  
Kara doesn't respond.

 

"Maybe I could come with you? To the beach? So you aren't alone." 

  
Kara looks at her with watery eyes her head still resting on her knees. "Yeah?"

  
Alex nods, smiling, "yeah I think as long as they know it would be okay. I used to go out early to surf before," she stops. Before Kara came to them. She switches track. "Maybe I could teach you?"

   
Kara's forehead crinkles, "Surf?"

   
Oh, this was going to be fun. How had she not thought of this before?

   
"Yeah it's incredible it's like flying but on a board on the ocean and there's no physical contact required so you don't have to worry. It's the perfect sport."

 

Kara sits up a little at that. "Okay." 

   
Alex is suddenly so excited to show someone how to surf she can teach her _little sister_ how to _surf_. It's one of her favorite sports and she is _good_ at it; and Kara seems slightly less upset than before. "Want to try now maybe?"

   
Kara looks to the floor, "you don't think I'm in trouble?"

   
Alex wonders if Kara is looking at her parents in the kitchen right now, "no, Kara, I think they just want you to be okay."

   
Kara nods, uncertain. 

   
"So how about it? Back to the beach?"

   
"Yes. I want to learn surf?" She asks hesitantly.

   
"Close. You learn _to_ surf."

   
Kara nods and stands, "I want to learn to surf." She looks down at Alex with a careful smile. 

   
"Awesome."


End file.
